About This Mess

“Oh, just relax and it’ll happen.”

That. That right there is quite possibly the STUPIDEST FUCKING THING you can ever say to a person dealing with infertility. I mean, really? After many consultations with numerous trained medical professionals I’m about to drop $15-$20,000 and endure countless intensely invasive medical procedures…but just RELAXING is the key to curing this problem? Why didn’t I think of that?!

I recently (on April 1 actually, and no, the irony is not lost on me) found out the only way for us to ever have a child of our own is through IVF. I just turned 31, my husband is 36, and we’ve been married for a little over 4 years.

I’m having some trouble coping with this new life plan of ours, quite honestly. Remind me to tell you about the time I took our dogs for a walk and as we passed the elementary school near our house, I dissolved into tears.

So here I am. I need an outlet for the insane amount of feelings I’m processing right now.


2 thoughts on “About This Mess

  1. Just found your blog… love that you don’t sugarcoat this shit!

    My husband and I just finished our first (failed) IVF cycle. If it makes you feel better, we only had 1 embryo make it, zero to freeze. Oh, and we only found out about my shitty eggs during the IVF process (until then, just thought we had MFI issues)… so we did (and paid for) 6 IUIs before that.

    I can honestly say in 2.5 years we haven’t had any good news.

    Hope you come back as one of the “miracle” stories after your beta on Wednesday,…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Agreed! There is an obnoxious number of people out there who are like “We’ve been TTC for four years but I’ll just continue being patient even though it’s trying…” STFU. This whole process makes me want to scream.


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