Surprise! Period showed up this morning so I got to make the lovely call and I start birth control pills tomorrow. I had a pleasant (SAID DRIPPING WITH SARCASM) chat with the new IVF coordinator. Don’t get me wrong, she seems incredibly sweet, but it was a very frustrating afternoon for me.
Apparently my clinic batches cycles. I never realized this. Their next stim start isn’t until 11/27 (happy fucking Thanksgiving to me) and they want me on BCPs until the 23rd. I was only on them for 13 days last time. Last we checked, my AMH was 1.2. Not DOR territory yet, but not awesome. They only retrieved 12 eggs with the last cycle and are shooting for similar or more this time. I flat out asked if there was concern for being over-suppressed and she said she would check with the RE, but she didn’t seem to think it would be an issue.
She went over the dates with me and promised to email me a calendar later in the afternoon. It wasn’t until I opened said calendar that I went off the rails for the dumbest reasons. My baseline sono? The day after Thanksgiving. My estimated retrieval? 12/8. Also known as 2 days before our 5th wedding anniversary, so any celebration we may have planned is now gone. Oh, and my husband’s company Christmas party falls on stims day 7. I’m sure I will be a lovely pleasant person for that.
Because I am an emotional train wreck, I immediately called my husband crying. Poor guy. I started the call by assuring him that I was crying for stupid reasons and I knew it but I just wanted someone to tell me everything was going to be ok. I explained the schedule and then apologized for ruining Thanksgiving, his Christmas party, and our anniversary. I know. A wreck, I tell you. He took it 100% in stride and said none of that mattered and that his priorities are with me and me alone.
Seriously. There’s a reason I married this dude.
I think it hit me so hard because it’s just another reminder of how IVF has taken over our lives and doesn’t give a fuck what we want. I was so excited about this anniversary. And now I will be curled up on the couch with a heating pad. Romantic. I love Thanksgiving…but now we have to cancel plans so I can get an ultrasound. I will now have to field a thousand questions about why I’m not drinking from people that don’t know we’re going through IVF.