Are you ready for the fun?

That is an actual quote from my RE this morning as I lay there pantsless with my legs in stirrups at 8 freaking AM as she pulled out the transvaginal ultrasound wand.

“Fun? Is that what we’re calling it now?” I asked.

She and the nurse laughed. “Yep. Fun!”

I took my last birth control pill last night. So I had to go in this morning for my baseline ultrasound. Affectionately known as a date with the twat wand (thank you infertility subreddit). Everything looked great according to the doctor, no cysts and ready to go. I have to go back Friday with my husband to sign all the final consent paperwork and receive injection training. They’ll also do a final baseline blood test before starting stims, and as long as everything comes back ok…shit gets real.

My injections start Saturday night. Follistim and Menopur. I can do this. I can totally do this. Really, I have ZERO OTHER OPTIONS other than to do this, but I don’t let that get in the way of my weird internal pep talk. 

Meds are all set to be delivered tomorrow. $3,119.61 worth of meds to be exact. If all this works, I vow to become a lobbyist for getting infertility treatments covered by insurance.

I’m straight up scared, y’all. Jokes and sarcasm have always been my coping mechanisms for absolutely everything in life. Sure, I joke with the doctor. I even joke with my husband about how we have to take a class to learn how to shoot me up. But really. I’m so freaking scared.

No one ever comes out of IVF saying “Oh, the shots were downright pleasant!” No one ever waxes poetically about the glorious days of bruised stomachs and asses. Hell, if this works, I can’t even say my husband was in the same room as me when our kid was conceived. Least romantic process ever. The next few weeks are going suck. A lot. And there’s nothing anyone can say or do to make it better or easier.

I’m terrified and anxious and nervous and sad and excited and worried and hopeful and pessimistic.

Damn, if only I could just relax, right?!

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8 thoughts on “Are you ready for the fun?

  1. I am in the same boat as you. Desperately trying to relax while freaking out. I think I have a week left of birth control, and I go in for my baseline ultrasound and bloodwork and how to injection myself lesson on Friday. Sounds like a fun way to end the week!

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  2. First, love that your RE has a sense of humor!

    Ok so after going through injection land 4 times already, I can say like LBAna said that honestly the shots aren’t nearly as bad as you think they’ll be. Tummy ones you can barely feel, and the intramuscular ones just require some prep: Make sure they’re the thinnest needles they can give, warm those tushies up real well beforehand (I disagree with the numb-with-ice advice soe give, as if you’re doing estrogen and/or progesterone in oil, you want that ass nice and toasty so the oil will disperse as quickly as possible and not turn your bum all lumpy because it was cold), do it standing up with all your weight on the non-booty leg (way easier for the partner and I found it forced me to relax my booty-leg, and have your partners look at the Sher Fertility videos on Youtube for how to do IM and all the other injections (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-EY_4P67Hs). My husband found those WAY more beneficial than what they showed him in the lab because he could watch it and pause it over and over. My only requirement for him was that he put a bandaid on it afterwards (not necessary) so I could remember each day where my last booty shot was. 🙂

    GOOD LUCK!!

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    • Thank you for all the helpful advice! It’s just another mental hurdle I need to get over. A few months ago, I would nearly faint just having blood drawn. Now I barely notice when they take 7 vials of blood. I don’t even bat an eye when I’m pantsless in a room with 3 or 4 people any more. So hey…shots can’t be too bad if millions of women before me have managed it, right?

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      • Heh…yeah I did a 15 minute meditation, yoga breaths and everything, before my first shot the first round. Then I asked my husband “when are you going to do the shot?” and he said, “already did it!”. Not all of them are perfect but it’s no different than getting a shot in the arm…you just feel more vulnerable. That’s why the partner has to do the shot in my opinion – keep them empathizing with what you’re going through! 🙂

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    • Ok, can I just say, I started PIO injections last night and all of this advice was a godsend. No ice, no weight on the booty-leg, and lots of heat, and it was not awful at all. My husband was way more traumatized than I was. I found the menopur much more awful than the PIO.

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