I am 1 in 8.


This week begins National Infertility Awareness Week. My husband and I are currently a part of the lovely statistic known as 1 in 8. And it sucks. It sucks a lot.

My annoyance today? My mother. Now I won’t sugarcoat it. My relationship with my mother has always been strained at best. I love her. She is my mother. But I don’t like her. And I know somewhere in her mind, she loves me because I am her daughter. But she doesn’t like me too much as a person either. The best we’ve been able to figure is that she has a bit of narcissistic personality disorder going on.

A few weeks ago, Mr. Oh Just Relax and I sat down with my parents and broke the news that there was no way we would ever be able to have a child without serious medical intervention and that we would be starting the IVF process. Without even blinking, with zero hesitation, do you know what my mother’s response was?


We just stared at her. I assured her that no, we weren’t making this up. We had seen numerous medical professionals, and it was not going to happen.

Again. She says “Bullshit. They’re just saying that. You should just stop trying so hard and relax. That’s your problem. What do you think your problem is?”

So. For anyone out there that has someone in their life turn to you and let you in on their problems. Just a suggestion for you. DO NOT RESPOND WITH “BULLSHIT.” I cannot stress this enough. What does this have to do with today? Well, she’s turned her focus on convincing me that the doctors are wrong. I’m no longer taking her calls.

It’s fitting that this week is NIAW because I am actually starting the process this week. I am all about the timing, right? We aren’t actually “out” to most of the people we know. My parents and my closest friends know. I’ve vented on twitter a few times because the only people that follow me on there are people I trust not to be dicks about it. I wish I had the courage to broadcast to the world that I am the 1 in 8…but I’m not there yet.


4 thoughts on “I am 1 in 8.

  1. Talking to people about infertility is very frustrating. If you feel you can’t handle constantly educating people about infertility then I recommend sharing with a few close friends and family members. You will likely need to educate them on how they can be supportive. Hopefully your mom is able to be a little more supportive in the future…I have had a couple of awkward conversations with my father in law, but he seems to slowly learning how to be more understanding.

    I wish I had told fewer people…some of the people I have told are really frustrating me right now. It’s so hard to figure out who will be supportive and who will be a pain in your ass! 🙂


    • Frustrating is one word for it. :p My friends have been fantastic so far, we’ll see how I am towards everyone when I start pumping myself full of hormones! Thanks for your kind words, it’s always nice to hear that I’m not alone in these struggles.


  2. Haha, yes frustrating is putting it mildly. When I get annoyed with something fertility related I usually say something about wanting to drop kick someone in the face….I feel like that describes my feelings more accurately! I try to use words like “frustrating” so I don’t scare people off.


  3. My mom was not very supportive either when I told her our dr recommended IVF. She believes in the whole, “just relax and you’ll get pregnant” stuff. Sometimes it’s so frustrating having to explain to her over and over that it’s not as simple as that. My friends tend to be more understanding. Hang in there!!


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